Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction ❯ It's A Beautiful Day ( One-Shot )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
Mantis: My first posted fic. I hope everyone enjoys it. I hope to get my Yu-Gi-Oh! story up soon. I’ve been working on it, so hopefully it’ll be up by the end of the week.
Summary: As Nagisa Kaworu awakes on the morning of the most fateful day of his life, he watches Shinji doze and contemplates his destiny, who he really is, and his own feelings for Shinji.
It’s a Beautiful Day
By: Mantis Reign
The first thing he became aware of when he awoke that morning to the light of the rising sun was the presence of the boy lying beside him. Ikari Shinji was a small, thin thing, though he appeared entirely normal by Lilim standards. He had short, dark brown hair and grayish-brown eyes, just like the father he so despised. But Nagisa Kaworu could see what others could not; he knew just how strong and special this boy could be.
“Today is the day. Today I merge with Adam and complete my destiny,” were the first thoughts that floated through his mind, although he was somewhat unnerved by how displeasurable the action now sounded to his mind.
The boy laying across from him on the spare futon was facing towards Kaworu, his face peaceful and unaware. “He knows nothing. He knows nothing of what I am, and what I am destined to do,” he thought sadly.
How ironic was this? Kaworu wondered. The Angel had fallen in love with the Eva pilot. Kaworu would be honest; he had never expected to truly develop feelings for Shinji. This was supposed to be easy. He was supposed to infiltrate NERV for SEELE, defeat the Eva pilots, and merge with the First Angel, Adam to bring around the Third Impact and the end of the world.
Then why was he suddenly doubting the very meaning of his existence? How could this… boy, mean so much to him? Kaworu had only just met him.
And yet Kaworu knew Shinji better than anyone else around him. He knew just how fragile Shinji was. Whenever he touched the other boy, Kaworu felt as though he might shatter in his very arms. Yet at the same time, he sensed a special kind of strength within the boy. A kind of inner strength the Lilim deeply admired. Kaworu found himself admiring it too.
Kaworu was nonetheless surprised when he heard a soft sobbing sound. He squinted his eyes and looked more closely at Shinji. The boy was having a nightmare or something. Tears had welled up in his eyes and began streaming down the boy’s cheeks.
A frown crossed Kaworu’s face. With every pained sound Shinji made, a sharp pain stabbed straight through Kaworu’s heart.
Why? He wasn’t supposed to have feelings. And yet, he did. It pained him to hear Shinji cry.
“I don’t want to see you cry, Shinji-kun. Be strong,” Kaworu found himself whispering, unable to bear the other boy’s suffering anymore. Before he even knew what he was doing, Kaworu had leaned over and given Shinji a comforting, light peck on the cheek.
The taste the few drops of Shinji’s tears left on Kaworu’s tongue were filled with so much self-loathing and sorrow it nearly brought tears to Kaworu’s eyes.
But almost instantly, Shinji calmed down and stopped crying. At Kaworu’s touch, the boy visibly relaxed, his frown being replaced by a soft smile.
Kaworu lay back down, his red pupils fixed on Shinji intently. Whether or not Shinji would admit it aloud, it was clear that the boy trusted Kaworu completely, even though he had never fully trusted anyone else before in his entire life.
It was actually a bit of a burden, Kaworu thought, when someone puts that much trust in someone else.
Some part of his heart wanted to lie there forever, just watching Shinji. Some part of him wanted to be there for the other boy forever and ever.
But he also knew destiny would never allow for this to come to pass.
Kaworu pushed his sheets aside and stood to his full height, dressing himself quickly. When he turned around, he found Shinji still sound asleep.
A long sigh escaped Kaworu’s lungs as he headed for the door, slipping out quietly as to not disturb Shinji.
If he was lucky, he would never see Shinji again and spare the boy much grief and pain.
He was hovering there, just hovering there. It had all been a lie after all. It wasn’t Adam that lay in wait at the bottom of NERV; it was Lilith.
Kaworu sighed sadly, tuning around to stare at Shinji who stood behind him in Eva Unit 01, ready to close in for the kill at the orders of his father, Ikari Gendou.
But Kaworu could hear Shinji crying inside the Eva. Shinji didn’t want to kill him, nor did Kaworu want to kill Shinji. But how could it be prevented? Kaworu would live forever, always trying to merge with Adam. That was his destiny as an Angel, a being born from Adam.
“I have free will. If I don’t want to harm Shinji and destroy the Lilim, then I don’t have to,” Kaworu came to this stark realization. It was then that he made up his mind. He surrendered to himself, and to Shinji.
“Shinji-kun, please kill me. My death is the only absolute liberty.”
At first, Shinji was shocked. Understandably so. His enemy, the beings he had been trained to kill at all costs, had become his friend and was now surrendering to him. Then he screamed out, Kaworu-kun, why? I don’t understand what you’re talking about!”
“Only one of us may live. You are the one who must live,” Kaworu whispered. He then closed his eyes, awaiting the end.
There was a long silence.
Then pain, excruciating pain. The Eva was literally crushing him effortlessly in its hand. And Kaworu could feel the utter devastation emanating from Shinji.
“But Shinji-kun, don’t be sad. It’s a beautiful day, with a beautiful sunrise to begin it. I don’t want to see you cry. I just want to see you smile,” were Kaworu’s last words.
And then he knew no more.