Fake Fan Fiction ❯ Down the Rabbit Hole ( Chapter 4 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Chapter Three: Down the Rabbit Hole
Date Written: 6/14/08
Rating: PG/K+, ’cause Jack’s well… Jack.
Word Count: 1,746
Fandom: FAKE/Torchwood
Characters/Pairings: Dee/Ryo, Team Torchwood
Spoilers: FAKE through to Volume 7, Torchwood up through Season 2
Warnings: None
Owen’s head popped up from the medical bay when the blast door’s alarms went off. Toshiko turned from her readings to look over the top of her glasses at Gwen as the Welshwoman stepped through the entrance.
Gwen just shrugged. « They turned up in the booth, » she said, approaching Toshiko’s computer station. « They knew what Torchwood was, and they knew Ianto by name. »
The Japanese woman was already calling up CCTV footage, tracking Ianto, Jack and their visitors along the Plass. There were some good face shots from the footage where the two men were talking to Ianto, and she set the facial recognition software running. « Anything else? A name, maybe? »
Gwen shook her head. « No, but they were American. » She came up behind Toshiko. « Jack palmed a comm system when he walked out, so you could probably hear them. Strange sort of accent, not like Jack’s at all. »
« Strange sort of accent? » Owen asked, giving her a teasing grin. « Isn’t there a saying about glass houses and throwing rocks? »
« Screw you, » Gwen shot back, smiling as well. « It sounded sorta like dis, » she tried to imitate the accent she’d heard.
« Oh, big help Gwen, » Owen said sarcastically. « They’re retarded Welshmen. Really narrows it down. »
« I resent that, » Ianto’s quiet voice came over the speaker’s of Toshiko’s computer.
« You resemble that, tea boy! »
« You resemble that, tea boy! »
The other, the dark-haired one, was glancing over his shoulder at Ianto, so he didn’t reply. He was already uneasy, so Ianto gave a small, comforting smile.
Jack was in the middle of one of his trademark outrageous stories, knowing full well he had the complete and utter attention of the lighter-haired man. He was waving his arms around and laughing, grinning over when the others laughed as well.
« Is there any way you can get them to tell us a name or two? » Toshiko asked. « It’ll narrow down the search before they get down here. »
« …and before I go into another story, I just realized how incredibly rude I’ve been, » Jack moved smoothly into the question. He smiled and turned, walking backwards in front of them, keeping eye contact with the two of them while still being able to shoot Ianto looks over their shoulders.
All charm and smiles and cunning, that Jack Harkness. He could have been a con man in another life.
« I’m Randy Laytner-MacLean, » the lighter-haired one — Randy — said, before turning to the other and giving a brilliant smile. « And this is my husband, Dee. »
Tosh frowned. « I know those names from somewhere, » she mused, pausing for a moment before pulling up the US Census Bureau’s webpage and hacking in.
Owen came up behind her to stand next to Gwen, wiping his hand on a rag. « What is it Ianto said? It’s almost obscene what you do to security systems?« 
« Oh, she’s amazing, » Gwen agreed. « Really, so glad you’re on our side. »
« Well, if they made it a challenge… » the other woman replied, grinning a little under the praise of her coworkers.
« Nice to meet you Randy, Dee, » Jack said, his grin widening. « And here we are! The Invisible Lift. » He jumped up onto the paving stone, coat swaying in the breeze coming off of the Bay. « Come on, step up, don’t be shy. »
Ryo looked over at Dee, giving him a little smile. « Maybe it’s a photo op? » he said in Japanese.
Dee just shrugged in reply. The odd sense of foreboding had gotten stronger as they’d headed back up the Plass, even though the other two had been nothing but kind.
It was like the tenseness of a stakeout. Being in the car with your partner, both of you bored stiff, and then one of you catches the suspect across the street, looking around nervously for cops.
Everyone watching out for everyone else, waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Fucking UK.
« We don’t have all day, » the Captain said with a grin, teasingly wagging a finger at them. « Important business to take care of and all that. »
Ryo squeezed Dee’s hand, stepping up on the stone they had been sitting on earlier. « Come on! » he said with a laugh, tugging on Dee’s hand.
The stone was a bit crowded when Dee stepped on, and when Ianto stepped up as well, Dee laughed. « A little crowded for one little stone, huh? » he said with a laugh.
One of Jack’s arms went around Ianto’s waist, pressing the Welshman’s back to the older man’s front. « I don’t mind being crowded, » Jack purred.
Ryo laughed softly, his breath warm against the back of Dee’s neck. Ianto rolled his eyes skyward in a move that clearly said why me?.
Jack laughed as well, bringing his other arm around Ianto’s waist. He reached around, flipping open his Vortex Manipulator and activating the Lift.
All four of them lurched a little as the paving stone shifted under their feet. Ryo let go of Dee’s hands to grab at his shoulders, and both Ianto and Jack reached over to steady the two men next to them.
The detectives’ eyes got progressively wider and wider as the stone lowered, both of them leaning over a little to get a better look at the Hub.
Gwen, Toshiko and Owen were standing close to the landing when the paving stone came to a stop. Ianto and Jack stepped off the stone, Ianto turning to help Dee and Ryo down.
Dee looked up when he stepped off, following the column of the water tower up through the pavement ceiling. « The set isn’t whole like this, » he muttered. Some movement caught his eye and he jumped a little when he caught sight of the pterodactyl sitting in her nest. « Is her name Myfanwy? » he asked, looking over at Owen.
Owen frowned and nodded in agreement. « How’d you know? »
« Lucky guess, » he replied before looking over at Ryo. « Fandom got something right, » he told his husband in Japanese.
Ryo covered his face with his hands. « This is all a dream, » he murmured in Japanese as well.
Everyone looked over at Tosh, who shrugged. « That one said that it’s a dream, » she offered.
« It is a dream, » Ryo said in English, his hands still covering his eyes. « I’ve fallen asleep in front of the television, and Bikky is to wake me up any moment now screaming over two fags kissing on screen. »
Jack laughed. « Sounds like my kind of show. »
« You have no idea, » Dee said, moving a little closer to Ryo.
« I don’t know if I should be honored or afraid to inform you that this is Torchwood, » Jack said. « I’m Captain Jack Harkness. » He pointed to Gwen, who smiled and waved a little. « This is my second, Gwen Cooper. » He waved a hand over towards Owen, who nodded. « Owen Harper, our resident medic. » He put a hand on Toshiko’s shoulder, and she smiled at them. « Toshiko Sato, technical expert. And last but not least, the gorgeous suit that is Ianto Jones. »
« I believe we’ve discussed harassment before, Jack, » Ianto said quietly, giving a comforting smile to Dee.
The Captain just winked back at Ianto. « But you both knew all of this, didn’t you? »
« Why does all the weird stuff happen in the UK? » Ryo asked aloud.
« Hey, as long as they keep the ghosts and murderers away from us… » Dee started, before throwing his hands up. « Oh fuck, what am I talking about? This is Torchwood. We’re screwed. »
Owen laughed as Gwen, Tosh and Jack made noises of protest. « They’ve got our number! »
« Oh God, we’re going to be Red Shirts, » Ryo moaned. « I’m a Red Shirt in my own fucking dream, how depressing is that? »
« Hey now, don’t talk like that, » Dee said, moving over to put an arm around Ryo. « Besides, you’re in blue today, and I’m in purple. See? » he coaxed, leaning over and kissing the side of his head.
Gwen motioned to a chair by Ianto. « Why don’t you let him have a sit? »
« Thanks, » Dee said, guiding Ryo to the chair. The older detective had his hands still over his face, and Dee moved to kneel in front of him.
« Owen, why don’t you check out our guest? » Jack asked, looking over his shoulder.
« Yeah, in my opinion as a professional, he’s having a nervous breakdown, » Owen replied, feigning disinterest.
« Thanks Doc, » Dee said sarcastically.
« It’s not a big one, just give me a moment, » Ryo replied, moving one hand away from his face. He took a deep breath and moved the other hand, looking down at Dee. « Baby? »
« Yeah? » Dee said, reaching up to run his fingers through Ryo’s hair. « What? »
« As cliche as this is going to sound, I want you to hit me. »
« Kinky, » Jack piped up from behind them.
« Hit me, pinch me, do something that would wake me up, » Ryo insisted, ignoring Jack.
« Again, kinky. »
Dee turned around to shoot Jack a dirty glare, but Ryo turned his face around. « Seriously. Do this and I’ll be fine. »
« Okay, » dark-haired detective gave in. He took a deep breath, reaching up and pinching Ryo’s cheek hard.
« Owowowowowow! » Ryo whined, leaning into the pull, trying to lessen the pain.
« Any more pinching and I’m asking them to turn around, » Dee told him in Japanese.
Toshiko let out a giggle, covering her mouth with a hand. Jack gave her a funny look, but she waved him away.
Ryo scrubbed his face with his hands one last time before sitting up straighter. « Okay, » he said only once, before reaching up to automatically tug at the collar of his button up. Dee recognized the motion; Ryo had pulled himself into the professional cop mode — which for them, as detectives, included a suit and tie.
Tosh clapped her hands together, making Dee turn. « I’ve got it! FAKE! »
Dee gave her a look. « You’re saying this is all fake? »
« No, not fake, FAKE! » Tosh tried to clarify before sighing. « I need to pop over to the bookstore real quick. Visual aids are required. »
Jack furrowed his eyebrows before sighing. « Go. »
« I’ll be back in a moment! » she called, grabbing her purse and running for the door.
The Hub fell into silence after she left, the sound of trickling water flowing gently over them as the two detectives looked at the team. « So, what happens now? » Dee asked.
« I’ll make some coffee, » Ianto said. « I think we’re all going to need some caffeine sooner or later. »
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